Hospitality has never been an industry reserved for people who followed a neat, predictable career path. In fact, many of the people who make the industry special arrived by a far more interesting route.
Some started in kitchens, some behind bars, some in housekeeping, and some, like Thomas Finn, entered the industry carrying responsibilities that would have overwhelmed many people twice his age.
In this episode of Back of House Banter, Amy speaks to hospitality recruiter, business owner and podcast host Thomas Finn for a remarkably open conversation about becoming a father at 17, dropping out of university and building a career while carrying a level of responsibility few teenagers are prepared for.
Becoming a father at 17
When Thomas found out at age 17 that he was going to have a child, he knew he wasn't equipped to understand the scale of what was happening. It was not planned (obviously), and there was tension within his family, complications in his education, and ultimately he had to leave university during his second year to become a full-time single dad.
At school, Thomas remembers being told that his priorities now needed to change. Rather than helping him explore how he might continue with the path he had imagined, the message was simple: leave education, find a job, and provide for the child.
Thomas did provide for his son, but he was determined to prove that becoming a young father did not have to define the limits of his future. “I've been forever, ever, since trying to prove people wrong and not be the statistic that a lot of young parents end up getting put into,” Thomas proudly claims, “I wasn't sure how I was going to do it, but I knew that it was just going to take a lot of hard work.”
For a time, that determination manifested itself in maintaining a facade. Thomas recalls buying a Mercedes he could barely afford to run and wearing a suit to drop his son at school, even when he didn't need to. In hindsight, he shakes his head at his impractical younger self, but, at the time, it was his way of showing the world that he was coping.
“I would get out of my nice car that I could only put about 15 quid's worth of petrol in, wear a suit, walk my son to the gate, so other parents would see a young person dropping their son off and they would just sort of not judge.”
Behind that image was a young father working hard, managing financial pressure, and trying to create a stable life for his son.
The small things that create stability
Despite the unnecessary car and suit, Thomas believes that good parenting is rarely about dramatic gestures. For him, it’s about consistency: being on time, being present, providing a stable home, listening, offering advice, and taxi services (where required).
Thomas also speaks about the practical skills that helped him provide for his family. His mother taught him to cook from a young age, and that knowledge became especially valuable when money was tight.
Rather than relying entirely on convenience food, he learned how to stretch fresh ingredients across several meals, cook from scratch, and make limited resources go further. He now passes those lessons on to his son.
It is a simple example of a thread that runs through the interview. Thomas’s story is not about one dramatic transformation. It’s about thousands of small decisions, consistent resilience, and moments of righteous rebelliousness, which, repeated over time, gradually created confidence and opportunity.
Building a career without a clear roadmap
Although both of his parents were entrepreneurs, owning a business was never part of Thomas’s original plan. He didn’t grow up imagining himself as a business owner, and his family situation meant that his immediate priorities were more mundane: earn money, support his son, and keep moving forward.
He eventually found his way into recruitment, specialising in hospitality revenue management. Along the way, he built strong relationships with people across the industry, without immediately realising how much trust he had earned.
The turning point came when someone in his network suggested that many people associated Thomas with his own reputation, rather than with the recruitment company he worked for. They asked whether he had ever considered starting a business of his own.
His answer was a resounding, dismissive “no”.
At the time, Thomas was living from pay cheque to pay cheque. Starting a company felt unrealistic, expensive, and far too risky. He had a child to support and very little financial room for failure.
To Tom's surprise (“Nobody likes recruiters. They just don't. They're like lawyers. You talk to recruiters when you need to, otherwise [they can] get lost”, he says), the idea did not disappear, though. Another contact of his “coincidentally” mentioned to Thomas he should consider striking out on his own. Other people in the industry began encouraging him, too, and one supporter ultimately offered the money Thomas needed to get started.
Thomas took on around £20,000 in debt to launch the business, knowing that failure would carry consequences he was not willing to accept. He also left his previous role with a final warning ringing in his ears: perhaps business development was not his strength, and perhaps running his own company would not work.
“I had a 20,000 debt to someone to start the business, and then I had someone that I needed to prove wrong. And it was that sort of perfect catalyst for the rocket to come right under me to say, this is it now.”
Once again, being underestimated and determined became his fuel. “There was no option here that if I started it, I could fail, because it was too important,” Tom says, “The industry gave me an opportunity, and I took it with both hands, and I’ve been here ever since… seven and a bit years in, now.”
The power of being backed by the right people
Thomas is quick to point out that his success was not achieved alone.
His mother offered practical and emotional support when he first became a father. Later, mentors, clients, colleagues, and friends within hospitality helped him recognise opportunities that he could not yet see for himself.
That support was not always comfortable. Sometimes it came as encouragement, sometimes as criticism, and sometimes as the push he needed to act.
Thomas and Amy both agree that this is one of hospitality’s greatest strengths. The industry has its frustrations, but it is also filled with people who are willing to offer advice, make introductions, share their experience, and stand behind somebody they believe in.
“I've worked in a number of different industries, and this one, there is – and everybody says it, it's such a cliché thing – but there is something truly special about the people within it. And I don't just mean the people in front of house or people at reception, because my connections are mainly within the commercial space and they are analytical, they are sort of outspoken, they do have opinions, but my God, are they incredible. And my God, if you're lucky enough to be in a certain circle, a certain tribe, a certain group of people, they are 100% behind you.”
That matters particularly for people who have not followed a conventional route into their careers, and maybe why hospitality gives people who would otherwise have been misfits a space in which to thrive.
Thomas and Amy both know how easily people can be dismissed because of their background, qualifications, personality, or circumstances. But hospitality repeatedly creates space for people from all backgrounds to prove what they can do.
“Know exactly who you are, what your values are, and be the person that you know you can be. Don't be lazy with it. Don't put things on the back burner.”
A pot washer can become a general manager. A waitress can build a career in hospitality technology. A young father with an unfinished degree can become a respected recruiter and business owner.
What matters is not whether somebody’s path looks traditional; it's their mindset. It is whether they are willing to learn, build relationships, and keep working hard.
“Don’t swim the route people tell you to swim”
Thomas’s advice to anyone facing a similarly uncertain future is to find someone impartial who can offer guidance. “Find someone who's not in that family circle, not in that family situation,” Tom recommends, “because they will have biases, they will have opinions, they will be passionate, and they will be judgmental about certain situations.”
A trusted mentor, particularly someone who understands but is not emotionally invested in the situation, can provide a different perspective.
Thomas also encourages people to understand their own values and resist allowing others to prescribe the route their life should take.
“Don't get me wrong, there's been bumps in the road, of course there has, but I think for anybody that is in a similar situation and they get told that there's a certain route that you need to go down [...] don't swim the route that people tell you to swim, because if you take guidance from people that have not stood in the shoes that you're in, you're basically playing by the rules that they're setting out. And I am someone that absolutely hates swimming in the same direction as everybody else.”
Thomas’s journey was not straightforward, and he does not pretend that determination alone made every obstacle disappear. There were financial struggles, strained relationships, self-doubt, and periods when he was trying to project confidence he did not yet feel.
But his story shows what can happen when hard work is combined with practical support, strong relationships, and a willingness to take an opportunity when it finally appears – coupled with resilience and profound determination.
Watch the full episode of Back of House Banter to hear Thomas and Amy discuss parenthood, business ownership, mentorship, podcasting, and why hospitality remains one of the best industries for people who refuse to be put in a box.
